Dear Baby Tillery
When we were in Italy, I remember sitting at the steps of the Trevi Fountain. With a penny in my hand, I clenched my fist tightly, closed my eyes, and threw it into the water beside a thousand others, making a wish that I hoped would come true.
Be careful what you wish for!
The morning of July 9, I woke up with a stomach ache. Hoping it was my long awaited period, I quickly got up to use the restroom. I had been comforted by friends who assured me that an irregular cycle is common after coming off birth control. I had taken 4 pregancy tests in the middle of June wondering if my wish at the Trevi Fountain in Rome had come true. The tests were all negative. However the morning of July 9, two little lines turned pink and changed my life forever.
I screamed at first, then cried. I held my tummy and started thanking God for the precious baby already growing inside of me.
I turned on worship music and blared it throughout my apartment. I cried for a good hour praising God for answering my prayers for a baby that I prayed for so many years. Jonny was leading worship that morning at Sandals, so I had time to process on my own and figure out how to tell him. I calculated my last period, and was given a due date of February 24, 2018. The most perfect date in the world. I headed to target to buy a onesie, my baby's first onesie. How in the world? I found myself hiding at target because if anyone saw me in the baby section, THEY WOULD KNOW. So I found the onesie and got out quick. I posted the date, the tests, and the onesie on the kitchen wall and headed to church.
Wouldn't you know it, I don't remember a darn word Pastor Matt said that day. I just remember wanting to hold my belly and savor every second. However, I could'nt do that, becasue I hadn't yet told Jonny, and his mamma was sitting beside me in church. We went to lunch at yard house like we always do. My MIL always orders the ahi poke stack and ahi nachos as an apetizer. I didnt know much about pregnancy do's and don'ts, but I knew that raw fish was out of the question, so I faked a diet that didnt allow me to eat fish. I know... some diet, right?
I remember each minute passing as if it were a hundred years. I felt as if my heart was going to explode out of my chest.
When we were finally in the parking lot, I told Jonny I had a surprise for him in the kitchen at home. I was hoping to throw him off, and it did. The dude thought I made cookies or something. Good grief.
I drove like a maniac to get home so that I could set up a camera to record his reaction.
His reaction was priceless. Tear filled and awe struck. One minute he was just a regular guy, the next minute he was going to be a father. It was amazing.
The next few days the fear set in. I have had so many of my friends endure miscarraiges, and even lose their newborn children. I almost didn't allow myself to be excited because if I didn't make a connection with the little babe growing inside of me, then if I lost it there would be less hurt.
Then I saw the ultrasound at 8 weeks, and sobbed tears of joy. People! Vaginal ultrasounds are just as awful as they sound. I could barely pay attention to the screen because I was so sure that the device she was using to let me see my baby, would sooner or later hit my baby. I know- I'm a first timer!
The doctor printed out a photo for us to keep, and thank goodness, because I barely got to enjoy the first few minutes of seeing my nugget because #vaginalultrasound. I put the photo on my nightstand and sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night and just stare at the picture. I would beg God to allow the baby to be safe inside me. The Doctor had measured me a little further behind then I thought, and gave us a new delivery date of March 13, 2018. The new best day in all of history. I was so grateful to have made it to 8 weeks, and prayed without ceasing that God would protect my little babe.
Telling our family and friends was so fun! I can't explain the look on their faces when my parents found out they were going to be grandparents. Or how my MIL who thought that we had some terrible news for her cried when we showed her the ultrasound. My baby sister calls me everyday on her way home from work to check on "nugget."
Basically, we are already in love.
So many people have asked if I have been sick. To be honest, when I am feeling sick, in the moment it felt like hell on earth. However, I realize that nausea in the afternoon and a few headaches are nothing compared to what some women go through. I haven't threw up, and I don't get too sick.
Food aversions: eggs, coffee, chicken & peanut butter. Come near me and I will give you the stink eye. Jonny Tillery... who eats these things. Every. Single. Day.
Things I love: cereal (we NEVER have cereal in our house. but now, there's like 7 boxes in the pantry.)
I can't take my prenatal vitamins without pineapple orange banana juice! We we went to Lucilles a few nights ago, which is one of my favorite restaurants... I ordred my favorite salad and peach lemonade, and drank a few sips and had one bite of my salad. DOUBLEYOUTEE-EFF?! This whole pregnancy aversions, cravings, and hunger thing is NO JOKE.
Shout out to all the kind people who have checked in on me, given me their advice, and rejoiced with us over this beautiful blessing.
Baby Tillery, I am already so in love with you. I can't wait to meet you. I love telling the world about you.
Love,
Mama
Be careful what you wish for!
The morning of July 9, I woke up with a stomach ache. Hoping it was my long awaited period, I quickly got up to use the restroom. I had been comforted by friends who assured me that an irregular cycle is common after coming off birth control. I had taken 4 pregancy tests in the middle of June wondering if my wish at the Trevi Fountain in Rome had come true. The tests were all negative. However the morning of July 9, two little lines turned pink and changed my life forever.
I screamed at first, then cried. I held my tummy and started thanking God for the precious baby already growing inside of me.
I turned on worship music and blared it throughout my apartment. I cried for a good hour praising God for answering my prayers for a baby that I prayed for so many years. Jonny was leading worship that morning at Sandals, so I had time to process on my own and figure out how to tell him. I calculated my last period, and was given a due date of February 24, 2018. The most perfect date in the world. I headed to target to buy a onesie, my baby's first onesie. How in the world? I found myself hiding at target because if anyone saw me in the baby section, THEY WOULD KNOW. So I found the onesie and got out quick. I posted the date, the tests, and the onesie on the kitchen wall and headed to church.
Wouldn't you know it, I don't remember a darn word Pastor Matt said that day. I just remember wanting to hold my belly and savor every second. However, I could'nt do that, becasue I hadn't yet told Jonny, and his mamma was sitting beside me in church. We went to lunch at yard house like we always do. My MIL always orders the ahi poke stack and ahi nachos as an apetizer. I didnt know much about pregnancy do's and don'ts, but I knew that raw fish was out of the question, so I faked a diet that didnt allow me to eat fish. I know... some diet, right?
I remember each minute passing as if it were a hundred years. I felt as if my heart was going to explode out of my chest.
When we were finally in the parking lot, I told Jonny I had a surprise for him in the kitchen at home. I was hoping to throw him off, and it did. The dude thought I made cookies or something. Good grief.
I drove like a maniac to get home so that I could set up a camera to record his reaction.
His reaction was priceless. Tear filled and awe struck. One minute he was just a regular guy, the next minute he was going to be a father. It was amazing.
The next few days the fear set in. I have had so many of my friends endure miscarraiges, and even lose their newborn children. I almost didn't allow myself to be excited because if I didn't make a connection with the little babe growing inside of me, then if I lost it there would be less hurt.
Then I saw the ultrasound at 8 weeks, and sobbed tears of joy. People! Vaginal ultrasounds are just as awful as they sound. I could barely pay attention to the screen because I was so sure that the device she was using to let me see my baby, would sooner or later hit my baby. I know- I'm a first timer!
The doctor printed out a photo for us to keep, and thank goodness, because I barely got to enjoy the first few minutes of seeing my nugget because #vaginalultrasound. I put the photo on my nightstand and sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night and just stare at the picture. I would beg God to allow the baby to be safe inside me. The Doctor had measured me a little further behind then I thought, and gave us a new delivery date of March 13, 2018. The new best day in all of history. I was so grateful to have made it to 8 weeks, and prayed without ceasing that God would protect my little babe.
Telling our family and friends was so fun! I can't explain the look on their faces when my parents found out they were going to be grandparents. Or how my MIL who thought that we had some terrible news for her cried when we showed her the ultrasound. My baby sister calls me everyday on her way home from work to check on "nugget."
Basically, we are already in love.
So many people have asked if I have been sick. To be honest, when I am feeling sick, in the moment it felt like hell on earth. However, I realize that nausea in the afternoon and a few headaches are nothing compared to what some women go through. I haven't threw up, and I don't get too sick.
Food aversions: eggs, coffee, chicken & peanut butter. Come near me and I will give you the stink eye. Jonny Tillery... who eats these things. Every. Single. Day.
Things I love: cereal (we NEVER have cereal in our house. but now, there's like 7 boxes in the pantry.)
I can't take my prenatal vitamins without pineapple orange banana juice! We we went to Lucilles a few nights ago, which is one of my favorite restaurants... I ordred my favorite salad and peach lemonade, and drank a few sips and had one bite of my salad. DOUBLEYOUTEE-EFF?! This whole pregnancy aversions, cravings, and hunger thing is NO JOKE.
Shout out to all the kind people who have checked in on me, given me their advice, and rejoiced with us over this beautiful blessing.
Baby Tillery, I am already so in love with you. I can't wait to meet you. I love telling the world about you.
Love,
Mama
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