Thursday Morning Walks

For the past year or so I have walked on thursday mornings with friends. Two beauties in particular who walk the 1.72 miles around the block with me. We meet around 7 in the morning so that we can still have time to get ready for work and the day ahead. Usually we text each other the night before and make sure that we are still on for the next morning, to make sure that we aren't sick or need extra sleep due to the craziness of life.

I've come to find that these Thursday mornings are precious to me. As the sun creeps through the trees, and wind gently blows in our faces we connect in a way that we may not have if we didn't wake before the sunrise to meet each other and walk.

The girls I walk with, I've known for years. I've known them as young women entering college. I've mentored them, they've mentored me. We've cried together, we've laughed together, we have lived life together. I've watched them date the men they are married to now, I went to their bridal showers, and attended one wedding, while standing beside the other as she married the man she loved. We can go weeks without seeing each other, and reconnect like no time has passed at all. I love these girls, and I love our Thursday morning walks.

This past summer was the hardest summer of my life. I endured things I did not think that I had the strength to endure. I cried tears of brokenness that seemed as if they would never end, all the while wondering where God could be in the midst of such brokenness. I also kept a lot to myself. My story was too much. It held too many details, too much sadness to bear, and place on other people. So I kept to myself. I told those who needed to know, and then when others would ask how I was doing, it would be the normal "I'm good! How are you?"
It was bogus. Yet, it was what I needed to do. I didn't have answers. I didn't have hope.

There was a week this summer where I was barely making it through. I was lonely, in complete despair and broken beyond belief.  I was attending a friends wedding, and my friend Tiffany who also attended the wedding, walked up to me and asked me "How are you?" I responded my normal "I'm good, how are you?"

Instantly she called me out- "Your'e not okay, what's going on?"

Called out.
Humbled.
Grateful that someone called my bluff.

She knew me well enough to know that I wasn't being truthful. She knew me well enough to know I wasn't okay. What I appreciated most, was that she was willing to step into my mess. She was willing to walk boldly into my mess and love me. When I started telling her the details of my story, parts that I didn't have the courage to tell others, she didn't shy away. She didn't back down. She stood strong and told me to be stronger. She told me to fight, fight hard, and be the woman that God has called me to be. Most people just said "Oh Kelly, I'm so sorry you're going through this."

Not her. Not Tiff.

She called me out, she told me I was brave, and I could make it through no matter what lied ahead. She knew that the God we serve and believe in would carry me through. She pointed me towards the Cross. She pointed me towards Jesus. I needed her that night. I needed her to not feel sorry for me. I needed her to be strong for me, and she was. I'm forever grateful for her.

We met for our walk this morning. The last few weeks we've talked mostly about how I'm doing. She doesn't mind hearing about my mess. She doesn't judge me when I tell her that I've been running to food to stuff my emotions. She tells me I'm beautiful, and that I don't need to eat my emotions, I can entrust my brokenness to the Lord. God doesn't want me to feed my stomach out of brokenness and pain. He wants me to feed my soul with truth, not my stomach with food. When I tell her things about my heart, she doesn't shy away, she calls me out, and reminds me that there are far better things ahead, but that in the messiness right now, God's grace can carry me through.

Towards the end of our walk today, I decided that I wanted to walk a little further with her. I desperately wanted to know how she was doing. We talked a little, she shared her heart, and I got to encourage her. I got to remind her who she is, and who she belongs to, as well as how brave she is, and how much I love her. I got to remind her of the great God we serve, and that He has big, beautiful plans for her life. I got to pray over her, and hold her. It was beautiful. I was late for work, and every second of it was worth it.

I love my thursday morning walks. They bring life and freshness into my soul.

Is there anything in your life that is similar to my Thursday morning walk? If so, comment below, I would love to hear!!

May God bless you and encourage you! May He allow you a Tiff, and an Aubree who you can walk and talk through life with.